Thursday, September 2, 2010

I think he's broken!

Polly finally acknowledged Nick as a human. Yesterday she play bowed when he stared at her. Cute, but somewhat dangerous, as labrador play bow is usually followed by labrador zoomies, where said labrador runs around like crazy knocking down everything and everyone in its path.

In Polly's mind all humans are required to perform two tasks. Throw BALL and play tug. Preferably 24/7. Therefore, as we were sitting on the couch this afternoon, minding our own business (well, actually I was watching Top Chef and Nick was watching his own hands), Polly decided that, being human and all, Nick needs to get with the program. I promise, I did not prompt or cue her in any way, I just recorded the events. This is why we have four cameras scattered around the house. To record stuff like that.

First, she found a BALL. Usually we keep all BALLs picked up, to avoid endless pestering. This was a rogue BALL.

Hey, small person, here's BALL. Do your job.

Umm, dude, we've been over this many times. This is BALL. Humans throw BALL. You are human. Throw BALL.

This continued for about 10 minutes (during which time Nick continued to intently contemplate his hands), after which I put BALL on top of the dog crate and told her to chill. She went outside and came back with a stuffy.

Ok, buddy, clearly you are a little defective in the BALL department. Let's go to the next lesson. This is a toy. You take it and tug. I tug back making ferocious growling sounds.

I had to take the toy away eventually, because I didn't want Nick to start gumming it. On a related note, I have a reasonable idea how to teach a dog not to take kid's toys. I have no idea how to prevent the kid from taking the dog's toys. So this is promising to be quite interesting.

Sheesh, I think this human is broken.

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